Hill Station? Nah... College Station

This was made when I first came into TAMU, and my opinions have since changed, 'facts' have been corrected and in general the picture I will be cutting now is entirely different.. Neverthless, I reproduce it here without editing any text, just to show how does a fresher look at things....Things that I have changed views on, are now in colour :)) ... n the rest black n white ;). The narrative is like, the 'fresher' Kaushik talks and the 'senior' Kaushik records his comments in colour for a fair picture to the audience ! ;)

The morning of 31^st July 2005, was my first in the small village of College Station. And, I don’t know how many more mornings do I have to see here. But believe me, the experience is not too rosey as it seemed from back home.

The village of College Station (which the Texans call a “CITY”) is built around the Texas A&M University. With around 6,000 acres campus(the third biggest in the US after Stanford ,I forgot the second!) you can imagine how big the town will seem to be. TAMU(that’s how everyone calls Texas A&M University) takes about 47,000 students at per semester. And most of them are not housed in the college. So, majorly, the town consists of leased accommodations. Small, two floored apartments. The tallest structure here seems to be the town water tower!

We get 4 channels with an antenna. And believe me, seeing them is a huge pain. There is no proper reception anywhere. We have to keep adjusting our TV antenna per channel!(can u imagine that?! In India itself, it was only in my mom’s home town, I had to do it last when I was in my 6^th standard!!).Apart from Fox and KAMU(TAMU's own station) no other channel has a proper reception. Of course there is cable television, but that costs 30$ per month. Hey, I forgot to mention this, we got our TV for free. And guess from where? TRASH BIN! Here desis get most of their things from the trash bin.(Should have been unfunded fresher desis actually :D) Mostly, Amrus trash their stuff which work perfectly fine but are too old for them at the trash, and we can pick it up from there. So, we got our sofa set and TV from the trash bin. Another roomie got his mattress (typically it costs around 40 $) from there too. Radio however is a different story. There are more than half dozen FM channels blaring the same loud English music all through! And for a guy with taste of Indian music???? Man, the plight is worst. Here, they still live prehistorically. People still watch home videos in cassettes!!! VCD players are still expensive. Most audio players don’t play MP3s.(Err.. I have since seen that it is only OUR player that dosent :D) And guess what? I brought my entire collection in MP3 cds!!! So, I guess its going to take quite sometime for me before I can start listening to my music!( The situation is still the same... only I now play my music in my computer at the office)
Texans are hugely patriotic. Wherever you go, you will find Texas and US flags hanging around, and slogans such as “Don’t Mess with Texas” !! Guess what, Texas is one of the few states where pedestrians are the kings.(Again, since I knew only about Texas then, its like Texas is US for me..... I now realize that Texas IS NOT US... its a whole diferent world out there)Come what may, pedestrians are treated with utmost respect. Even if the signal turns green, and someone is walking on the zebra corssing, all the cars wait for us to get to the foot path!

About the town?! Well, we do have Wal Mart, HEB, Target… n other giant supermarkets…(all pale in comparison with the big towns :) )And one more thing. In case I didn’t mention this before, College Station is a twin city with another town called Bryan. So, its more like Hyderabad, Secundrabad style. I mean its like postal address says it’s a different town, but for all practial purposes they are the same. So, like the malls are 2 each. Wal mart for instance has 2 stores for College Station and Bryan!!!

Believe me man, this store called Wal Mart is huge!!!! (hehehehhe..... this guy is crazy!)If this is what he could build for this village, I was wondering how big it must have been in proper cities like Houston, Chicago and all of them. Desis, have a car pool system. Public transport here sucks big time. In fact, here at College Station, I would say its next to zero. For instance, I cannot get to Houston (which is 90 miles from here) without begging for a lift. Of course there is a bus that runs once a day! So, getting to Wal Mart which is on the other end of the town is also ruled out. The first thing that funded PhD students buy is a car! And immediately, they become friends for everyone!!! People from 4-5 apartments squeeze into the single car and buy stuff sufficient for a month….

About the campus. Man its so spread about. Unlike IIT which has lots of trees between its buildings, here, the space between the two buildings is made into a garden! So, this adds to the heat. I mean, we don’t have a nice shelter where you can rest.We have a golf course, an airport and a nuclear reactor within the campus! The reactor though is used only for experiments! George Bush Sr. has a huge Presidential Library here. It is said that 36% of the Texas Tax Payer’s money is brought into this University alone. An interesting fact is that TAMU’s first citizen is a bitch. No, seriously, it is a female dog! Legend has it that when the TAMU football team was getting back from Arlington after losing its 10^th match consecutively, and their truck broke down, they found this dog and it seems it protected them or something like that. Since then, it had become the TAMU team’s lucky mascot. They have never lost a match after that, and now millions is spent on that dog. It travels only in airplanes! Guess what? It is free to roam around the campus, and if it enters a class and barks, then that class is left for the day!!!! Crazy people isn’t it?!

'Pot'ty Lucked

On the afternoon of 30^th August 2005, i got locked up in my home's bathroom for as long as 3 hours.... might sound a not too long time...but folks....try it out... n u will know how long a time it is...

first, an introduction of my bathroom! it is small.... fcourse it has a tub n a shower...but certainly small... its got yellow walls!(stop thinking!)... n ya.... like every american house bathroom it has carpets... n like conventional desis we like to keep our bathrooms wet....so in the process the carpets r screwed up! n they stink.. we tried dryin it once outside....but it started stinking differently again once it came back inside.. there is a ac duct into the bathroom....but the old home that mine is....it is faced upwards.... n unlike desi bathrooms... there aint no ventilation windows.....

next, the situation... it was a typical hot afternoon, with everyone runnin between home n classes.... we (me, hari and anand) got back to have our lunch.... i made the lunch... so after eating the food... everybody had to visit the loo.....anand was done first and said he was leavin to the comp lab to send some mails... n said he will be gettin somewhere else from there..... hari was to meet a prof in the dept.... i had to get to the dept too...so i asked him to wait....but he said he is runnin out of time n ran off... this meant i was alone in the home at 2 in the afternoon..... so like any typical loo visit i pick a book n get inside..... guess what is the book? DISCOVER YOUR DESTINY.... :)

not realizing what happened with anand before... happily lost in thoughts i locked the door tight.....so what happened with anand? the inside knob of the bathroom got jammed... so it meant only ppl from outside cud open the door!!!!! once i closed the door i realized it...but the situation demanded i needed to attend some more urgent matters first......! finishing up... i tried all possible techniques....nothing worked.... n worse? the stink from the carpet starting taking over..... using up half the roll of toilet paper i cleaned half the bathroom dry n slept for sometime... i had to get up when it starting gettin suffocating... n i decided this is it.. i m gonna do something... i picked up the bathroom scissors, nail cutter n starting opening the knob... when it opened up, i used the scissors to push the lever to open the door....

situational details: unlike everytime, i decided to leave my pants outside in the room and went in only with my undies! so at the time of pushing open the door.... i was jes in my tshirt n undies...

position? i was kneeling down n trying to open the lock such that i cud see where the lever is.....

what happened? suddenly the big mass of the white door disappear and a giant in blue n brown was standing instead!

anand came to pick up his pack of ciggerrates (god bless his smoking habit!) realized that someone got stuck in the bathroom n decided to help by opening up.....

what did he see? me in my undies.... with a pair of scissors in one hand and nail cutter in the other kneeling down in front of him!!!!!

man... the others had a laugh of their life.... looked like the DCH situation... ppl were rolling down laughing... while i was jes sittin out....enjoyin the new found fresh air!\

WORRRRRRRRRRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Punch" Deva Yagna

It was a typical boring Sunday Morning of 17th April, 2005. Mom had left for Hyderabad some days back, so that meant, there was nothing to look forward to for the lunch as well. The TV had the same old boring programmes running. Sunday Times as usual did not have any news....only semi nude models and all the gossip associated with them!

Just when I decided to pick up the Dilbert book that was gathering dust on my table, dad called me to the temple nearby. Normally, I would have refused. But this time, there was nothing worth doing, and secondly, he was talking about some PanchaDeva Maha yagna which was going on in the grounds next to it.

So, there I was. At the Manish Grounds. This ground has an interesting story. It remains the only piece of real estate in my area untouched by an builder. This ground is real huge. A little additional space, and I guess it will be as big as a real cricket ground itself! and the people of manish nagar, guard it with their lives! literally! I believe some years back, when a builder bought it to set up a go karting arena there, there were huge protests and rasta rokos to stop the builder. Thankfully, the ground is still there..... intact....
with its own walking track... between huge sky scrapers.

About the yagna, that i went to witness? man.. i was spellbound. There it was. At the middle of the ground. A huge temporary structure of bamboo. The structure is really impressive, what with its fantastic cross ventilation. Considering that it was going to be there only for 9 days, I think a considerable effort went into building it. Inside this bamboo structure was a sight thats really rare to watch. A 100 havan piers were blazing inside. And there were four vedic brahmins per pier who were meticously feeding it with ghee and all the havan samagree. Indeed a fantastic scene. So much of heat was coming out. In fact, 1 minute near this structure, i was sweating profusely. And there they were. Inside it. Offering the pooja. On the background was the divine chants of the Veda. I dont know if you have experienced it, but listen to a well versed vedic brahmin chant the veda, and you are sure to get the goose bumps! So fluid.... so elegant... so
commanding....so authentic.....so.....beuatiful........ n there were a dozen of them chanting in a choir....... man...it was so so good! what was good to observe, was that the people performing the yagna were of

so many age groups..... the youngest was looking not more than 10 years of age(really cute looking with his little pony tail on a bald head!)... n there were the veteran 90 years too... all together... in unison...... performing the yagna.... the entire event made me speechless!

An interesting observation was that, despite mumbai being so "modern" in its approach to life, people here are deeply religious.... you have people wearing minis, coming to temple daily! and there they were....while the brahmins continued to perform the yagna, hundreds were going around the bamboo structure offering their prayers....

One thing that is there with any event in mumbai, is that it is extremely well organized. every possible arrangement will already be made.... these people are so professional in their approach! there can never a situation where things will go wrong... but then I guess....with this kind of population, it is really necessary.........remember the gangai amman koil festivals that keep going on yearly there in chennai? theres so much of chaos everytime.....but here...somehow(at least till what i have seen) that never happened.....i mean... just imagine....... it is just a small temple in a relatively small colony...but still they have arranged it so well.....

Unfortunately, that was the last day... it was synchronised to complete a day before the sri rama navami festival! at the end of the yagna, it seems they was going to be free lunch...unlimited in capacity, and to unlimited people..... humungous task indeed!
The 'punch'deva yagna for sure, made a huge mark!

Lakalakalaka in Mumbai

On the 17th of April 2005, was the first time I saw a Rajni movie in Mumbai.Man, what a huge difference it was from Chennai. The last time I saw Padayappa(his another super duper hit) in Chennai, I could
barely manage to hear the dialogues, could hardly here any of the songs and could hardly see the movie too..... such was the mob reaction to his dialogues... to his dance movements.... anything he
did.....had to be appreciated with a shrill whistle.....if it a song.....everyone got up n danced.... if it was a fight..... n someone poor chap managed to touch him... then he gets to hear the most third rated gaalis....n if some character says something demeaning about rajni...then thts it..... chappals fly to the screen.......RAJNI's entrance is marked with rupee notes and lottery tickets flying all over the theater...shrill whistles...huge rounds of applause.Theatres playing his movies always make huge profits... This despite the fact that at the end of two days of playing his movies most of the seats are torn.... (sometimes there were reports of the screens being torn down too!)show timings need to be changed( I have heard that in smaller towns...some scenes r played twice..thrice...depending on the crowd!)...Such a tremendous mob impact this one man has over the people of tamil nadu.....n the latest to join the frenzy....r the ppl of japan(incidentally the same set of ppl who make the most technologically advanced devices for the ppl of the world!).....

wht makes this man enthrall n sway so many millions of ppl....wht is it abt this dark man from maharashtra (who was a bus conductor in his lesser known human days!)throw so many people into a state of frenzy
with his one liners or his gait? is it the looks? is it the style? is it the grace? is it the charm?is it the super stunts(which most of time cross the limit n become ridiculous?).....or is it his ascetic personal life? wht is it? a tough question indeed...... wht surprises me is the fact that he gets all the tribulations in tamilnadu...whereas in his home state he is almost taken for a joker!
Rajni for sure cant be compared to any other movie star..... no SRK fan would be ready to burn himself for SRK....no SRK fan would tear down the screen if something goes wrong....no SRK fan would stone the
houses of the directors, producers and the music directors if the movie does not meet the crowd expectations....... why did i have to choose SRK.... coz in the movie fraternity i believe SRK comes closest
to associate any mania with someone..... fcourse theres a chiranjeevi in andhra...but thts still lesser compared to rajni....(but thts another story)politicians...yes...i have heard....but then... thats a
paid crowd......indeed rajni is unique.....

so there i was..... payin 130 for a ticket that costed 130....! for all the previous rajni movies i either paid twice the ticket amount if it was before 50 days of release....or wait for a ridiculously long 150 days before i could get tickets through the counter...! it was a peaceful sunday evening..... i was nostalgic hearing so much of tamil all around me....so many south indian faces.... so many saree clad women(for a change, the theatre was filled with properly covered women!)...so much of oil dripping hair!(seriously..i yearn for tht
too!).....surprising to see that so many were ready to leave the final one day match between india n pak n came to see rajini bash up the villains! To my surprise, the movie was running a houseful....! the story was a typical rajini story..... of course u must not be readinthis for the story...so i m goin to save the trouble! n in case u r still reading this to know what lakalakalaka is all about.....go n see the movie!!!! lakalakalakalaka!!!!

Lost Inorbit

This was my third visit to the Mumbai's biggest mall. For a place big enough to hold 600 cars, I think Inorbit, by any standard is big. And every visit, the girls' dressing was progressively looking up. As, the days are getting hotter, the collar lines and the waist lines are gettin lower and the skirts are getting shorter. It was for this, that we decided to hit Inorbit. This was one of those malls, that had it all... The ground floor was taken by GIANT the chain of those supermarkets where everything was dirt cheap. In fact, thanks to GIANT, my monthly packet of NUTRAMUL which is 70 Rs at my usual grocery shop, costed me only 69.30 Rs. KOOL......>!!! Thank you GIANT!

Apart from GIANT, there was also SHOPPERS STOP and LIFESTYLE....(of course these shops extended to the second and the third floors as well....)n for a change from their outlets in chennai(when i left it ie) these were swarming with ppl....

What got me to write about INORBIT.....was the range of the shops that were found there... Apart from the conventional Planet Ms and Lee outlets, there were other 'hatke' kinda concepts that I doubt if in any other Indian city, and for that matter any other mall, where these shops could make any business....!

There was an exclusive shop for BARBIE. BOSE had an exclusive outlet too..... With the starting price of 75 k for a simple 4 speaker set, I wondered what kind of clientele was this guy catering to.... N there were others.... Ipod had an exclusive shop.... Of course there a dime n dozen shops all throughout that sell Ipod, but a shop jes for that?!!
There was a shop that called itself Hobby... n it was selling ideas for having HOBBIES!!!! it cant get worser than this... In this fast paced city, u actually goto a shop to buy an idea of what kind of
hobby u want!!!

Then, there was a shop that was selling memorialia.... small signature cars and bikes... there was another called earth....where there were selling freshly made "ANTIQUES"! N there was another shop selling designer name boards!mind u, this isnt the conventional road side name
plate selling shop its got english speaking sales people, tryin to understand your personality to sell u the board that reflects ur true self!!! n the starting range? a kool 2k!!! n there was another
selling only pens!!! have u heard of stationary shops selling only pens before?! it has got pens ranging from 4Rs to around 10k!

I have heard a lot n read about this one before, but this is the first time i was actually seeing one... a shop meant exclusively for lingerie! n surprise....unlike other such shops were men rnt
encouraged to step in.... this one had no such qualms!( its a different matter that i didnt dare to step in!)

The third floor had a multiplex, with 3 screens running 10 movies(with at any given point of time has to have a minimum of 1 SRK movie!oh gawd, these mumbai ppl...when will they ever get rid of their mania for this nut!...but thats for some other time)!!!! god knows how do they manage that!

And the rest of the floor is devoted to the mumbaikars all time favourite-- FOOD!!! a concept that i saw in chennai in a much smaller scale...... all the famous...(n not so famous) eatiries have a shop here... u buy ur food.... find a place to sit...(which u never ever will!) n ENJOI!!!! n of course there was a games arcade too!!

To sum up... the mall reflected perfectly the city it was living in..... NOISY.... SMELLY.....(of perfumes and food together!)...LOUD..... N EXPENSIVE...... !!

MAN... i WAS LOST in ORBIT!!!!

Purply Hazed

In more senses than one, this is the first 'official' blog......

So here we go...

On the evening of 19th March 2005, was the first time i visited a lounge bar. Called, the Purple Haze, it was supposed be the swankiest, coolest and the most happening place to be on a saturday evening in Bandra. I was taken there by my cousin with his three colleagues. After a quick swag of a cold coffee with ice cream at the Cafe coffee day on the Carter Road, we moved to the purple haze. While I should have been warned with the things to come, from what I saw at cafe coffee day, the excitement of hitting the dance floor, with skimpily clad babes dancing around me, detracted me away from the sights of a group teenagers happily smoking away their "worries" with hash.... The girls were all busty, voluptous, and bitchy. The guys were all fat(the kindest i could think of) and snobbish... but thats another story.

The entry into Purple Haze made us poorer by Rs 600 each. Actually, since there was a girl in the group, one guy managed to save a hundred, as entry to couple was lesser. Once inside, I was dumbstruck. Blinded would have been a better word. There was not a single decent lighting anywhere. The whole place was so gloomy. It was surprising to think, that people could actually come here and forget their worries. It was 9:30 in the evening, and the whole place was literally empty. Sans the purple clad waiters around, and a couple(the woman was indeed skimpily dressed with a tatoo on her shoulder to show off), the place looked more like an abandoned dungeon where nobody of a decent upbringing would even think of going.

We were offered a small single stool(which the waiter claimed was a table for six!!) and shown the menu. Frankly, I know I am poor with eating outside, and I do not understand most of the menu cards I look at, but this was a way too much. The puzzled look was on everyone's face...(though the rest wouldnt accept it). After the pages and pages of alcoholic drinks, we could just about manage to see only the starters. Where was the main course? "Sorry sir, where you are sitting, we offer only drinks with starters.... For the food, you will have to go the floor above".... shocked us out. The guys in the group were very clear. We can go without food, but we r here to watch the babes.... n we r not goin anywhere without that. So, we decided to blow up the 2800 on starters and drinks to watch the babes. We were told, that the place would only start getting full by around 11:30.... that was a cool 2 hours away. and with a plate of French fries costing around 150 bucks, we were not sure how long will the 2800 last.

Stretching the single glass of rum, vodka or mocktail(whoever ordered the drinks) became the single point agenda. The music(god knows for whom were they playing it for) became louder and louder as the time passed. By around 10:30, it transcended into noise, and water in my glass was rippling in effect to the bass from the speakers. I was just about to tell everyone this, when I realized, that the rest of the gang, had just then started actually enjoying it!!! Cursing my south indian upbringing, I decided to keep quiet.

Slowly, the guy on the rum, started cracking typical adult jokes. I too pitched in( though I am not too sure, if people around actually even bothered to hear it!).

Everyone was bored. The service was pathetic. The music was shit. And everyone was waiting for that magical moment of 11:30....(as if, by then suddenly the flood gates would open,and all the heavens blessings would be showered on us....! and nude women will spring up from nowhere!)

Just as luck would have it, we blew out the money by 11:20 and the next minute, we were asked to leave to make space for the more "REGULAR" customers! Mouthing the choiciest swears and gaalis, we left the place "PURPLY HAZED"! lookin back, we realized tht indeed the place was getting full with the babes...!

GOD BLESS THE PLACE!